Saturday, 24 December 2011

Vancouver Police

Aaand As usual, I have nothing but great things to say about the Vancouver Police Department. I came accross a fight between some drunken idiot, and Santa. Naturally I did step in, but as neither of them happen to be zombies, all I could do was stop the fight until the Police arrived.
I am quite impressed with the way that the the police handled the situation, and I look forward to working with them again in the future.
Merry Christmas (or whatever other holiday you choose to or not to celebrate)
Good night all, you will hear more about the holiday insanity soon (lots more)

Sunday, 18 December 2011


I got some hate mail today. Seems someone (who shall remain nameless) has decided to attempt to copy what I do. He was bitten, now I have to "remove" this idiot from existance. Now the main issue here is: DO NOT TRY WHAT I DO AT HOME (or anywhere else for that matter) unless accompanied by a certified Zombie Removal Specialist such as Myself. Moreover do not even look at this site, it is offensive (although in this day and age, I don't know what is not offensive to at least someone)
By accessing this page you waive any rights to annoy the hell out of me, sue me or any of my associates for anything at all, or do anything else rediculous.
Remember that Zombies are no laughing matter, they are hazardous to your health, annoying, smell bad and are not cheap to deal with.
Lastly, have a sende of humour and don't forget how awesome I am.

Wednesday, 14 December 2011


I regret to inform everyone that the catch and relocate program set out by our provincial government concerning gnomes has been a failure. More work is needed, but expect to see a proactive euthanasia program on the books very soon.